Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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