i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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