The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
