All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
it's like iHOP with fire
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
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