We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Randomize
