first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
