it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
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