Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
