She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
