i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
