so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
