He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
