don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I ACCIDENTALLY HOOKED UP WITH A GUY WHO HAS A NICHOLAS CAGE POSTER ABOVE HIS BED I CANT HANDLE LIFE.
The universe is either telling you 1. you make terrible decisions or 2. its time to let go of your hatred of Cage.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
