big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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