She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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