we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
