So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
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