when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Randomize
