Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
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