The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize
