i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Randomize
