Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
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