so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
