At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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