the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
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