I just saw a hot homeless man
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
