i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
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