no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I came so hard my ears popped.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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