No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
