If you die in college, do you die in real life?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
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