how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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