Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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