Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
