weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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