But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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