you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
