Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
