So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
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