You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Floor bacon is actually really good
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
