One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
