dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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