Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
