return my video game
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I love you. Go after that dick
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
