Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
