it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
