I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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