Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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