Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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