I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
