So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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